Words Made into a Poem and into New Words

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And now … New words and old words rearranged to say new things!

  • Universities! Save time and space by shortening “in-state tuition” to just intuition.
  • The word “Grammy” is obviously derived from grammar, so I think they should at least use correct spelling: the Grammys should be called the Grammies.
  • Have you ever noticed that whenever they hold supervillains in special glass-walled cells on tv an in movies, they never give them a bathroom?
  • A vintage bicycle is a classycle.
  • A chewy cucumber is a chewcumber.
  • Why do we call it “air conditioning” when we turn on the cold? “Air conditioning” sounds neutral — it should cover turning on the heat and turning on the cold. Somebody fix this language problem so I can buy a window cooler.
  • Pants would be nice, but I’m a little short on cash — can I just buy one pant?
  • My hairdo is so bad I call it a hardon’t.
  • My dream job would be Chef Justice of the Supreme Torte.

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