Self Help Books That Have Yet to be Written

I have checked, and Google returns zero results for the promising titles of these self-help books, which you are now free to write & make a million dollars:

• “How to Make Your House Ugly”
• “Surgical Enhancements to Your Organs”
• “How to Write Silent Music”
• “How to Embezzle From the Police Force”
• “Festive Divorce Themes”
• “How to Open a Failing Business”
• “How to Launder Money Through a Pizza Joint”
• “Teaching Tricks to Slugs for Fun and Profit”
• “Top Ten Parts of Your Body to Remove”
• “How to Surrender Your Soul to Satan”
• “Fun with Gerontology”
• “How to Date your Dentist”
• “1,000 Gibberish Words to Use at Parties”
• “How to Become Less Mindful”
• “101 Uses For Used Kleenex”
• “How to Make Yourself Taste Better to Cannibals”
• “How to Avoid Floating Off Into Space”
• “Which Dog Breeds Can Pass as Human?”
• “Ways to Improve Your Coughing”
• “Grow Taller with These Simple Tricks”
• “How to Pass Yourself Off as Slime Mold”
• “How to Wear Your Human Skin”

I hope this has been helpful. Please share and follow this blog. It probably couldn’t hurt.