Oopsy Daisybrain

  • When people say, “Now, then,” are they just trying to cover all bases? Why don’t they say, “Here, there”?
  • “Eric” doesn’t convey much information. From now on, I will go by my entire genetic sequence. You can call me for short.
  • But if I ever run into Marjorie Taylor Greene, I’m gonna tell her my name is Law … Marshall Law.
  • What’s the problem with si level rising? If you ask me, there should be more si’s and fewer no’s!
  • 1011011110010101101101 Am I right?! (I’m experimenting with digital comedy.)
  • Anyone who tells you that age is “just a number” has probably experienced very little age themselves.

Here are some redundant phrases in common usage:

  • Shouldn’t Instagram be called Instaounce in non-metric countries?
  • Is a vintage bicycle a classycle?
  • Why do people tell you to “drink liquids” but they don’t bother telling you to “eat solids”?
  • How come in every guided meditation, after telling you to breath in and out deeply, they tell you to “continue breathing”? For that matter, how come in yoga they always say, “remember to breath”? That’s some pretty cheap advice. I mean, it’s like trying to get credit for saying, “continue to reflect light.”
  • If somebody wants to be left alone, you can walk away, saying “I’ll be right back.” Therefore, if they want to be right alone, you should say, “I’ll be left back.” I’m just trying to make the world less confusing.

Attention Trekkies:

  • A stubborn tribble is intractribble.
  • Mr. Spock excels at spocken word poetry.
  • Since time-travel was an established reality in Star Trek, why didn’t the Enterprise go back in time and rescue Kirk right before he’s killed in
  • Why isn’t there a plastic wrap?

That’s all I will impose upon you for now. Please follow this blog and my other: ocdfree.blog. Thank you!



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store