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This post, contrary to its title, first appeared in the original Daisybrain blog on Wordpress in the year 2010.
Hampster: a hamster that lives in a hamper
Altercation: the altering (spaying or neutering) of a cat
Evidence that we value violence:
We tell kids that hitting is wrong, yet singers want hits. In fact, smash hits are best; webmasters want as many hits as possible — they actually desire unique hits. Baseball players want hits, evengrand slams. You want a cute person to hit on you… after all, that could be a real kick. Maybe it’s a person with a really ripped body who has a crush on you.
Your teacher tells you to use bullet points in your paper.
Some people go out intending to have a smashing good time, even to get smashed. When they finally go home they just want to crash.
Actors go on stage hoping to break a leg.
A good joke ends with a punch line.
Although people generally try not to get knocked down, some people try to get knocked up.
You can have a blast at a bash. You can even enjoy the punch.
Filmmakers work hard to get a good shoot.