Diva Las Vegas!

Image credit: http://www.newnownext.com/diva-a-history/12/2018/

Is it possible to generate an entire new language from Hollywood Divas? I say yes! These words will, of course, have to be cleared by professional Aretha Franklinguists.

Here are the basic new words you will need to survive:

For lunch, you have a choice between a Barbara Steisandwich and a Diane Von Furstenburger. Wash it down with a glass of Nicki Minajuice. It’s a Lady GaGastronomic delight!

Convenientl = a convenient Yentl

Ingenude = a nude ingenue

Barbaric = a barbaric Barbara

Barbarista = the one who makes your coffee

MacDonna = a new Madonna-themed food from MacDonalds

Sex, Liza Videotapes = a risqué yet artsy film

Cherotic = Cher being erotic

Your mustache is now your mustaCher

If you are going to dress in drag, why not dress as Christina Draguilera?

This Halloween, pour yourself a drink heavy on Arethanol and settle in for a late night showing of Madonna the Dead.

Beyondcé that, I have no more to add.

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Here’s some new shit:

• A Shitstrom is a shitstorm at a Stromboli joint.
• A Shitake is a shitty Shiitake
• A Shitzu is a shitty little Shih Tzu
• A shitty vacation includes a shitinerary
• A poorly italicized word is shitalicized

Shit. That’s it.

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Shorten things up:

• “I remember Bernie” is too long. It should be “I rememBernie.”
• A forgettable getaway is a Forgetaway.
• The all too common phrase, “Ted Koppel feels uncomfortable from over-eating” can be shortened to BloaTed.
• If you are suffering from gas distress, perhaps brought on by eating dairy while lactose intolerant, you can just say, “I am fartful.”
• An eggplant Parmesan can be an “Eggplarmesian.”
• The upcoming end of democracy is “Endocracy.”